MR

http://news.bbc.co.uk/cbbcnews/hi/newsi ... 353570.stm

A 3m snake (a little over 9 ft, for the metric challenged) believed to have been living in toilet pipes in a block of flats for three months has been caught.

The boa constrictor, named Keith, is thought to have been abandoned by a resident who was evicted after owing £5,500 in rent to his landlord.

The huge snake has been slithering out of toilet bowls throughout the flats in Manchester since August.

A brave resident finally put the snake's antics to an end by coaxing the creature into a bucket.

Keith - who is actually thought to be female - had been sighted loads of times by the terrified homeowners but no-one had been able to catch the slippery customer.

Residents had been forced to put bricks on toilet seats in a bid to keep the snake from popping out of the pan.

A spokesman for the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA) said it was not uncommon for snakes to be found in household sewage pipes.

Spokesman Jimmy Ratcliff said the snake seems to have been living quite happily: "This is not really unusual, but for a snake of such size to have been found, is quite out of the ordinary.

"It would have no problem travelling up and down the waste pipe and has probably been eating rats from the sewer."

I guess I don't need much imagination to figure out what this snake has been eating.

I wonder if it likes tampons or turds better?

Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

No but the look on your face would be priceless.

They had these little snakes in Guam that were so aggressive they were upsetting the ecological balance of the Island by killing all of the smaller animals. These fuckers were popping up in the toilet, biting balls, ass, vulva lips and anything else that was hanging down there. Nasty little bastards.

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

artist4perry wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

No but the look on your face would be priceless.

So true

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

Every post you make is just stupid. Makes zero sense. Just go away douche.

Rockindeano wrote:

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

Every post you make is just stupid. Makes zero sense. Just go away douche.

But he looks up to you Deano

Babyblue wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

Every post you make is just stupid. Makes zero sense. Just go away douche.

But he looks up to you Deano

Yeah Deano, he's a loyal to ya. Look at those big puppy eyes...............Your going to have to just house train him that's all!

artist4perry wrote:

Babyblue wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

Every post you make is just stupid. Makes zero sense. Just go away douche.

But he looks up to you Deano

Yeah Deano, he's a loyal to ya. Look at those big puppy eyes...............Your going to have to just house train him that's all!

nah steview2 is MY hero

Everett wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

Babyblue wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

Every post you make is just stupid. Makes zero sense. Just go away douche.

But he looks up to you Deano

Yeah Deano, he's a loyal to ya. Look at those big puppy eyes...............Your going to have to just house train him that's all!

nah steview2 is MY hero

So you changed your mind is that it??? Well Deano, so sorry but you are out the door now big guy. Steve W2 you better watch out.

Seriously, explain to me and everybody else here, how "Guiness, is the poor man's Miller Lite?" I'd love to hear this explanation.

Rockindeano wrote:Seriously, explain to me and everybody else here, how "Guiness, is the poor man's Miller Lite?" I'd love to hear this explanation.

I for one would not know. It all stinks to me. I cannot stand the smell of beer. So you can have it all..........I won't be one you have to ever fight for the last or first one. Now puppy boy up there is running away from home to SteveW2's house. Either Steve will have to swat him with a rolled up newspaper or your going to have to get him a shock collar to keep him from roaming. And for the love of Pete please house train that labradoodle already! He keeps piddling all over the posts. It is almost as bad as yulog pooing all over the place.

artist4perry wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Seriously, explain to me and everybody else here, how "Guiness, is the poor man's Miller Lite?" I'd love to hear this explanation.

I for one would not know. It all stinks to me. I cannot stand the smell of beer. So you can have it all..........I won't be one you have to ever fight for the last or first one. Now puppy boy up there is running away from home to SteveW2's house. Either Steve will have to swat him with a rolled up newspaper or your going to have to get him a shock collar to keep him from roaming. And for the love of Pete please house train that labradoodle already! He keeps piddling all over the posts. It is almost as bad as yulog pooing all over the place.

OMG!!!! That is just to funny

Everett wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Can you fucking imagine living in the UK, going on a bender, pounding Guiness and fish and chips, and then finding yourself on the shitter when that fuckin Keith takes a bite out of your asshole? Good God! It makes me squeamish to think about it.

guiness is the poor mans miller light

How is this a poor man's beer when it costs more than Miller Light??

Internet article excerpt...

"Price, and a few tips..

A typical 8-pack of Guinness can be found on sale at my local Vons/Safeway, for about $12 or so. Guinness is a bit on the expensive side, but it is also a very very heavy beer."

omg that is just hilarious....snakes are biting and eating anything they come face to face with in or on the commode. omg that is awful! i'm going to check the next time i sit down on anything. omg.

Rockindeano wrote:Seriously, explain to me and everybody else here, how "Guiness, is the poor man's Miller Lite?" I'd love to hear this explanation.

Me too...as it's twice the price???

Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Toilet humour is hilarious Ginger. Diarrhea is funny. Shit is funny. Messed up drawers is funny. It all is hysterical.

Rockindeano wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Toilet humour is hilarious Ginger. Diarrhea is funny. Shit is funny. Messed up drawers is funny. It all is hysterical.

Yeah...that is how we deal with it.

A hospital will make you seen anything in a new light!

Rockindeano wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Toilet humour is hilarious Ginger. Diarrhea is funny. Shit is funny. Messed up drawers is funny. It all is hysterical.

Especially when you pinch one right? Snake suppository................(Jaws music inserted here!)

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Fantazie? Hell, no! It's nasty as hell! That's why it worked!

7 Wishes wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Fantazie? Hell, no! It's nasty as hell! That's why it worked!

That would more likely make me want to swear off of dating all together.

7 Wishes wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Fantazie? Hell, no! It's nasty as hell! That's why it worked!

Dude, my last girlfriend Karen, was pretty conservative acting, and frowned upon my juvenile actions and humour, like farting and belching, etc. Anyway, I heard her mumble something about having to go to the bathroom real bad when she walked in from work. She ran outside to grab something, so I slithered into the shower and hid behind the curtain. She came in and took a shit. It was awesome! She had all the noises that we guys do. Of course she didn't know she was alone until I started grunting, trying to stop myself from laughing out loud. When she saw me peer through the curtain, she about snapped. She ordered me out of the can, and slapped my ass on the way out...that fuckin' hurt. Needless to say I didn't get any that night.

Rockindeano wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Fantazie? Hell, no! It's nasty as hell! That's why it worked!

Dude, my last girlfriend Karen, was pretty conservative acting, and frowned upon my juvenile actions and humour, like farting and belching, etc. Anyway, I heard her mumble something about having to go to the bathroom real bad when she walked in from work. She ran outside to grab something, so I slithered into the shower and hid behind the curtain. She came in and took a shit. It was awesome! She had all the noises that we guys do. Of course she didn't know she was alone until I started grunting, trying to stop myself from laughing out loud. When she saw me peer through the curtain, she about snapped. She ordered me out of the can, and slapped my ass on the way out...that fuckin' hurt. Needless to say I didn't get any that night.

Rockindeano wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

7 Wishes wrote:Toilets are the Great Equalizer. We all look like idiots sitting on the can.

That was how I used to prepare for a date with women who were out of my league (most of them) - seriously. Right before I'd meet them or pick them up, I'd picture them pinching a loaf. It worked.

You fantasize about women pinching a loaf..............what is with you guys and your toilet training hangups?

Fantazie? Hell, no! It's nasty as hell! That's why it worked!

Dude, my last girlfriend Karen, was pretty conservative acting, and frowned upon my juvenile actions and humour, like farting and belching, etc. Anyway, I heard her mumble something about having to go to the bathroom real bad when she walked in from work. She ran outside to grab something, so I slithered into the shower and hid behind the curtain. She came in and took a shit. It was awesome! She had all the noises that we guys do. Of course she didn't know she was alone until I started grunting, trying to stop myself from laughing out loud. When she saw me peer through the curtain, she about snapped. She ordered me out of the can, and slapped my ass on the way out...that fuckin' hurt. Needless to say I didn't get any that night.

I wonder why

I'm not EVEN kidding, that would scare the living hell out of me. I'm afraid of snakes (like REALLY afraid) anyway, but one climbing out of the toilet would just about give me a heart attack. NO SHIT.

epresley wrote:I'm not EVEN kidding, that would scare the living hell out of me. I'm afraid of snakes (like REALLY afraid) anyway, but one climbing out of the toilet would just about give me a heart attack. NO SHIT.

No kidding?