Bassist Chuck Panozzo's new book tells stories of ...

[styxfanNH]

Original Story URL:
http://www.jsonline.com/story/index.aspx?id=624847

Styx's murky waters
Bassist Chuck Panozzo's new book tells stories of band tension, loss of musician brother, life with AIDS and coming out
By DAVE TIANEN
dtianen@journalsentinel.com
Posted: June 26, 2007


His band is named after a mythical river that runs through Hades, and Chuck Panozzo has seen more than his share of hell.

Styx bassist and founding member Panozzo has survived AIDS, stage II prostate cancer and the loss of his brother and band mate, John, to alcoholism.

He also has survived and triumphed as a gay man in the strenuously macho and sometimes homophobic world of rock 'n' roll. He tells his story in a new book, "The Grand Illusion: Love, Lies and My Life With Styx" (Amacom, $24.95), written with Michele Skettino.

Since he still is in treatment for AIDS, Panozzo has to conserve his energy, but these days he's feeling well enough to tackle simultaneous book and band tours. He will be at Summerfest on Friday when Styx plays the amphitheater with Def Leppard and Foreigner.

Panozzo grew up in Chicago's Italian neighborhoods, and Styx began as a teenage collaboration among the two Panozzo brothers and former lead singer Dennis DeYoung.

Looking back, Panozzo realizes he was different from other guys but kept his sexual orientation secret from his parents and his band mates for decades. Only his brother and sisters were told the truth, but the greatest deceptions were self-inflicted.

"They were basically lies I told myself," he says by phone. "I knew I was gay, but I couldn't come out and say it."

Panozzo's self-deception nearly killed him. He had known he was HIV-positive since 1990, but in '98 he became seriously ill. He started passing out, his weight dropped to 130 pounds and cancerous lesions called Kaposi's sarcoma started breaking out on his body. It was only the intervention of a friend that influenced him to see a doctor.

"I had been so ashamed to get help for my problem," he writes in the book. ". . . But finally, I had to ask myself the question, 'Do you want to live or do you want to die?' "

After the doctor diagnosed him with AIDS, Panozzo finally told his band mates about his sexual orientation and his health condition.

"We're no longer 20-year-old kids. They could see something was wrong. I dropped 30 pounds in a period of a few months. . . . I made the decision that I was extremely sick, and if I didn't do something I wouldn't be anywhere."

Creative differences
It took a long time, but with the help of a 23-pill-a-day regimen of treatment, Panozzo eventually regained his health.

Getting his AIDS under control was not the end of Panozzo's health crises, however. In 2004, a routine health checkup revealed that Panozzo had stage II prostate cancer. He was 56 years old, the same age his father had been when he died of cancer. He had two tumors on his prostate and because of his AIDS, radiation therapy was not an option. Surgery was the recommendation, but with it came risks.

Ultimately he flew to the Dominican Republic for an experimental ultrasound treatment.

"I felt fine. The treatment was on Friday. I was home on Sunday," he says.

Better yet, the cancer was gone.

Panozzo was not the only member of Styx to have serious health issues. His brother John died in 1996 after a long battle with alcoholism. In the late '90s, frontman Dennis DeYoung developed a form of chronic fatigue syndrome that made him extremely sensitive to light. Although he recovered, his band mates had made the decision to move on without him.

There had been internal squabbles within Styx for many years, anyway, with DeYoung wanting to take the band in a more pop, theatrical direction and his band mates opting for a more rock 'n' roll approach.

In his book, Panozzo makes it clear that he had creative differences with DeYoung. He remembers with special chagrin when DeYoung had them dress up like robots for the "Mr. Robot" tour. He hasn't seen DeYoung in years and disputes the notion that the band isn't Styx without him.

"What makes Dennis non-replaceable?" he asks. "Styx started out in my basement. When John died, I could have said, 'It's not Styx without John Panozzo.' Don't get me wrong. I wasn't happy with the way this happened."

'Who's gay here?'
Some may find irony in knowing it was the straight Styx frontman who kept nudging the band toward Broadway theatricality, while the gay bassist wanted a more rock stance.

That irony was reflected in the gay community as well. Panozzo recounts how in his early days of frequenting gay bars, his status as a rock star carried surprisingly little weight or even recognition. Panozzo was a rocker in a gay community that loved disco and dance music.

He writes that "not one gay man I knew cared much about rock 'n' roll."

"There was this era where I felt sort of disenfranchised," he recalls. "They just didn't get it. I took a different route."

If his music made him something of an outsider within the gay community, Panozzo said that he was never entirely at ease socially within Styx and kept largely to himself. With the passage of time, that awkwardness has abated somewhat.

Of course, if the man who loves arranging flowers has sometimes felt out of sync within the macho culture of rock music, that culture has its own quirks.

"I'll see the guys stuffing themselves into skin-tight pants, putting on eyeliner and bleaching their hair," he says. "I'll kid them, 'So, exactly who's gay here?' "

[Ash]

"I'll see the guys stuffing themselves into skin-tight pants, putting on eyeliner and bleaching their hair," he says. "I'll kid them, 'So, exactly who's gay here?' "

Ok - so stuffing yourself into tight pants and bleaching your hair makes you gay? Last I checked Panozzo never did that. He of all people should know those things don't make you gay. It's other things.

[Skates]

And you know if you actually read the book, Ash, you might get the context of the quote.

And the article writer should have read it a little closer as well..."Mr. Robot tour"?

[Zan]

And you know if you actually read the book, Ash, you might get the context of the quote.

Or at the very least, a vague idea of Chuck's sense of humor.

<---Who does recall seeing Chuck in tight pants from time to time, not that there's anything wrong with that

[Rockwriter]

And you know if you actually read the book, Ash, you might get the context of the quote.

And the article writer should have read it a little closer as well..."Mr. Robot tour"?

What's really funny to me is that in Chuck's book, he refers to Kilroy as "Dr. Kilroy" and kinda mangles the plot of the Kilroy concept when trying to explain it. I thought that said it all . . . the band members themselves, most of them didn't know or care what the thing was about. I think that's a large part of why it didn't come off any better than it did. Apathy usually doesn't inspire the best performances. I still think if that material were re-slanted for Broadway, with real actors, and re-titled "Roboto", it could be a smash. The pop culture recognition factor is very high now.


Sterling

[Ash]

And you know if you actually read the book, Ash, you might get the context of the quote.

And the article writer should have read it a little closer as well..."Mr. Robot tour"?

Get a new argument - please. I have no interest in reading about the gay experience. Sorry. If I want to hear about the gay experience, I'll ask my friends - not some rock guy.

[blt man]

I still think if that material were re-slanted for Broadway, with real actors, and re-titled "Roboto", it could be a smash. The pop culture recognition factor is very high now.


Sterling

Do you think JY and TS would really allow the songs they wrote to be used in a broadway production?

[Rockwriter]

I still think if that material were re-slanted for Broadway, with real actors, and re-titled "Roboto", it could be a smash. The pop culture recognition factor is very high now.


Sterling

Do you think JY and TS would really allow the songs they wrote to be used in a broadway production?

If it was something that could exponentially increase the visibility of the brand name Styx, the way 'Tommy' did for the Who or the Abba Broadway thing did, it would be hard to say no. But if they did object, let's face it, the only two songs that are widely known from that work are "Roboto" and "Don't Let It End", and "Roboto" is the only one that has any continuing pop culture impact. Dennis could drop the whole plot line that was a compromise with the group, return to his original vision, use "Roboto" to lead it off, and re-write the whole thing to replace the other songs. The average theatergoer certainly wouldn't know the difference, and at the same time, his original story notes were way better anyway than the goofy dumbed down version that ended up getting made. Hire some real actors and you might really have something. Not that this is ever going to happen, but if he decided to do that he would have financial backing by this time tomorrow because of the pop culture recognition factor and the fact that other rock/Broadway things have done so well. The theater demographic has changed dramatically in recent years.


Sterling

[Zan]

Get a new argument - please. I have no interest in reading about the gay experience. Sorry. If I want to hear about the gay experience, I'll ask my friends - not some rock guy.

Not to point out the bleeding obvious here, but it is you who keeps insisting on commenting about his "gay experience" (and anything he says regarding his "gay experience"), so I think we're at a stale mate, mate.

[gr8dane]

Get a new argument - please. I have no interest in reading about the gay experience. Sorry. If I want to hear about the gay experience, I'll ask my friends - not some rock guy.

Not to point out the bleeding obvious here, but it is you who keeps insisting on commenting about his "gay experience" (and anything he says regarding his "gay experience"), so I think we're at a stale mate, mate.

Or as buddy froy would say 'Check mate'

[StyxCollector]

Chuck's book isn't about "the gay experience" for heaven's sake - there's now how-tos for fellatio, et al. It is not some sordid tale. It's just the story of his life. So what if he's gay? Why does that make a difference?

[StyxCollector]

If it was something that could exponentially increase the visibility of the brand name Styx, the way 'Tommy' did for the Who or the Abba Broadway thing did, it would be hard to say no. But if they did object, let's face it, the only two songs that are widely known from that work are "Roboto" and "Don't Let It End", and "Roboto" is the only one that has any continuing pop culture impact. Dennis could drop the whole plot line that was a compromise with the group, return to his original vision, use "Roboto" to lead it off, and re-write the whole thing to replace the other songs. The average theatergoer certainly wouldn't know the difference, and at the same time, his original story notes were way better anyway than the goofy dumbed down version that ended up getting made. Hire some real actors and you might really have something. Not that this is ever going to happen, but if he decided to do that he would have financial backing by this time tomorrow because of the pop culture recognition factor and the fact that other rock/Broadway things have done so well. The theater demographic has changed dramatically in recent years.

Look at Queen's "We Will Rock You". Not the most critically lauded show ever, but it's been running for, what, six years in London's West End? I saw it there about 3 years ago and the book is bad - not the best written musical, but you go to hear the Queen music. As someone who has done pit bands, I have mixed feelings about musicals like "Tommy" or "We Will Rock You" because the singers tend to kill the originals for me with the Broadway-esque vocals. When I saw "Tommy", being a fan of the Who's work, it was just not good. If I had no preconceived notions of the music, I'm sure I would have loved it.

I do agree with Sterling that someone would bankroll some kind of run of a KWH-type play that had Styx music. Will it happen? Who knows. If Billy Joel can get a ballet ...

[Zan]

Chuck's book isn't about "the gay experience" for heaven's sake ...It is not some sordid tale. It's just the story of his life. So what if he's gay? Why does that make a difference?

Hear hear. But then, you'd have to read it to know that.

- there's now how-tos for fellatio, et al.

I am cracking up here. (That reminds me of a joke)

[cittadeeno23]

Sterling, I heard the original Kilroy story was much darker and much better.
Do you know the details of the original story?? I remember it being talked about in your book, but I don't remember anyone giving specific details as to what it was about.



Thanks
Jimmy

[Rockwriter]

Sterling, I heard the original Kilroy story was much darker and much better.
Do you know the details of the original story?? I remember it being talked about in your book, but I don't remember anyone giving specific details as to what it was about.



Thanks
Jimmy

The original, I've only read the partial notes that are in the Greatest Hits record, and I read an interview with Tommy where he talked about how it was originally just Dennis' life story, thinly disguised and then fictionalized and futurized. The band didn't want to do that and the whole thing got re-written, but yes, originally it was not as cheesy. Even the partial notes in the GH album are far more interesting than what got done. I also had a conversation once with Derek Sutton in which he said that when Dennis first pitched the idea to the band over in Japan at the end of the PT tour, it was dramatically different than what ended up actually getting done. He thought the finished album was terrible, but at one point Derek was pretty excited about turning the whole thing into a feature film.

I hope all is well.


Sterling

[Skates]

And you know if you actually read the book, Ash, you might get the context of the quote.

And the article writer should have read it a little closer as well..."Mr. Robot tour"?

Get a new argument - please. I have no interest in reading about the gay experience. Sorry. If I want to hear about the gay experience, I'll ask my friends - not some rock guy.

How about one person's experience....no, wait, that would cause you to open your mind...